3 Secrets To Leading Change When Changing is Tough

3 Secrets To Leading Change When Changing is Tough

by EDGY Insights

Nothing changes in your life until you decide you need to change. It doesn’t matter what incentive is in front of you or what penalty is behind you — you will only change when you decide for yourself that change is necessary.

That’s true for you. And it’s true for everyone else around you.

That’s important to remember as a leader.

Just because you want to change and just because you want your people to change doesn’t mean that the people you are leading will see the need to change.

That can create a big problem for you — especially if you’re the type of person who feels compelled to keep leveling up. While it might seem obvious to you that growth is always important, and that changing towards improvement is necessary, it’s not obvious to everyone else.

And it won’t always be easy for you to change.

So what do you do when you want to change other people? What do you do when you feel like other people changing will actually make their life better for them?

What if that person is you?

1. Respect how difficult changing really is

The problem with changing is that it’s both new and uncomfortable. Even when you are excited about the possible positive outcomes, the first few times you try changing, you end up with miserable results. Almost always.

The pattern looks a little like this:

  1. You know you need to change, so you think about changing.
  2. Then you convince yourself to start changing.
  3. But changing is awkward and uncomfortable and feels horrible — even with great results.
  4. That forces you to decide whether or not to continue changing.

That’s the pattern — whether you’re in business trying to close deals or in a relationship where your partner tells you things have to change or they’re out.

Changing is difficult. That’s not an excuse. But it should impress upon you the importance of treating it with the seriousness that it deserves.

Changing isn’t easy. And it’s not automatic. It requires conscious work on your behalf.

Perhaps the biggest reason why leaders find it so difficult to lead change is that they don’t take the act of changing seriously enough.

They just add it to their list of things to do — like everything else. But changing isn’t like everything else. It’s more emotionally impactful. It requires more brainpower. More energy. More courage.

It’s new and wildly uncomfortable.

Which means it requires more of “you” to navigate.

If you’re a leader, covered up with six to seven hours of meetings and conference calls each day, you aren’t emotionally prepared to change.

Which is why most discussions around change quickly degenerate into a discussion about priorities and productivity.

To change in a meaningful way, you have to do more of the uncomfortable things that you’re not used to doing and less of the “productive things” that you can check off your list and feel good about each day.

But you know the difference in intensity and purpose. You’re giving change the respect that it deserves.

2. Focus on an overwhelming need to change

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to change when you need to change?

You might spend 50 years screaming “bloody murder” about how you’ll never eat green leafy vegetables, but once you’ve had a heart attack and the doctor tells you that you’re at high risk to have another one, it’s pretty amazing how quickly you decide you want to change.

Cold turkey. Overnight. It happens instantly.

Because it’s a mindset change.

The vegetables didn’t change their taste, and your taste buds didn’t magically evolve to appreciate the uninspiring taste of healthy food.

The only thing that changed was your desire to live. Your ambition to hold back the looming consequences of your actions.

When you strip away all the emotion, changing isn’t actually hard. But needing to change is very hard.

And then some days it’s not hard at all.

It’s the only option in front of you.

But when that day comes, where change is the only option in front of you, you might find yourself in a position where you’ve already wasted strength and life and the ideal opportunity to do something that truly transforms the world around you.

That’s a lesson that you need to share with your people, and remind yourself of each day:

  1. Take life seriously right now.
  2. Use each moment you have as an opportunity to be a better version of you.
  3. Push the limits of what you think it’s possible.
  4. Work harder than you think you should.

Put in the effort. Sweat. Bleed. Fight. Be possessed with a calling bigger than yourself. Need to change before you have to change.

3. Use momentum as your measuring stick

At face value, changing appears to be nearly impossible.

Long-time studies show that 70% of change management projects fail.  That means that as a leader most of the changes you want to drive will fail — more than 2 out of 3 will end in disaster.

Which begs the question: “Is change really possible for business? And how do you measure it?”

Because if change isn’t going to happen, you should know that as early as possible.

You should be able to predict when something might work and if what you’re doing right now is (or is not) working. You should be able to predict a successful change.

What makes change nearly impossible is the metrics and measurements used to define and scale change.  The truth is that there is really only one accurate predictor of successful change — momentum.

Any meaningful change starts small. So the evidences of successful change are largely unnoticed for a while.

Due to the raw dynamics of big business, momentum is the single best way to measure change.

Just going through a series of steps and exercises doesn’t cement the change you want to see become successful.

You have to build momentum, maintain momentum, and increase momentum around the change that you want to drive.

Momentum looks at different key performance indicators than revenue and profit and basic customer satisfaction. Momentum digs deeper at things like:

  1. How many fewer meetings can we have as a company and still communicate better?
  2. How many of our existing customers are offering their help to grow our business?
  3. How often are we thanked for our extra effort and told we are over-delivering?
  4. How are we creating and delivering memorable marketing and sales stories?
  5. How many of our customers are sharing (on their own) our story with ideal prospects?

This type of momentum is what delivers better results.

It’s not “skin deep”.  It’s thoughtful and comprehensive.

And it’s what builds momentum.  And makes change possible.

As you lead change, remember that life is full of seasons.

There is a time to be up and a time to be down. You’re going to find yourself celebrating success, another time scrambling to recover from what seems like impending doom.

There are moments when everything is good and you don’t feel the need to change — other moments where you can’t change fast enough.

Each one of us is going through these seasons at different times — and all at the same time.

Be the best you possible. Show the results that come from being willing to change. Accept and celebrate the hard changes others are willing to make in their pursuit of getting to that next level. Stay true to your mission for leveling up.

Some days it’s going to feel like everything is working perfectly. On quite a few other days, you’re going to feel like absolutely nothing is working.

Take a deep breath. Keep moving towards where you want to be.

Changing is worth it.

3 rules high performers live by

3 Rules High Performers Live By (That Are Hard To Achieve, But Surprisingly Simple)

by AttitudeEDGY Insights

Success is frustrating. The advice you get from people trying to help you is often conflicting and seemingly impossible.

Your own pathway is confusing. At times it’s hard to make sense of the feedback you’re getting from your actions.

Failure one day can often look like success the next. What used to work doesn’t work anymore — and the changes you’ll need to make to fully appreciate that are often the most frustrating part of your journey to success.

This raw, human element to navigating the twisting pathway of success is often the part that undoes you. It’s often the obstacle you can’t get around.

That’s because what’s missing from your struggle — and the entire conversation about success — is simplicity. You need less to do. Less to manage, monitor, and obsess about. Inside the giant cornucopia of rules that make up success, you need a few, simple ride-or-die beliefs that you can hold on to. Philosophies and rules and edicts that guide your daily existence.

Over time, those will change as your goals change and as your skills and your expectations change. It’s not for me to tell you what your rules for you should be.

I’ve focused on many different ones for years. Tried some. Abandoned many. I’ve also read the rules that other successful people put in place for themselves, sometimes even speaking and interviewing them. Digging deep into what works. Building relationships with those I share the most in common.

Despite how you word them, here are the three simple rules that successful people live by.

1. Be Honest

This is a hard one. A really hard one at times. You will feel the impact intensely before, during, and after your exercise this behavior.

Most often when you hear someone talking about “being honest” the discussion involves the word “liar”, but honesty is a lot more complex than that.

It’s about candor and kindness and believing that you can help others level up when you encourage them with your clear, illuminating insight.

Before that happens with others, you have to experience the discomfort that creates by practicing honesty with yourself.

It’s impossible to practice radical candor with others when you haven’t first done the same for yourself.

  • What was the last time you took a few minutes to examine your motives and intentions?
  • When was the last time you had an honest conversation about your results, your effort, and your attitude?

It’s easy to look around and blame all of your problems on other people and their bad behavior. To blame bad luck. To pretend like none of the reasons why you are where you are right now have nothing to do with you.

But that’s not being honest. Not in the least bit.

Nothing in life is an accident. Your results, your predicament, your income, your obstacles — they are all there for one reason or another.

Be honest with you. It’s an emotional investment you won’t ever regret

As for being honest with others — you already know that it’s the right thing to do. But somehow — and when it matters most — you don’t do it. You hold back. You equivocate. Pause. And obfuscate.

You aren’t honest. And it’s not because you’re a stone-cold, manipulator. Or a con man. Or a liar.

IT’S MOST LIKELY BECAUSE BEING HONEST IS HARD WORK. IT’S A HUGE EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT.

By being honest with others you have to care about them. A lot.

It’s easy to tell others what you know they want to hear. It doesn’t hurt their feelings and you don’t have to invest in a tough conversation where you tell them that they can achieve more if they’re willing to put in the time and effort to improve.

Which is why being honest is such an important rule.

The fact that it’s hard to do already puts you in an elite category of performers. To do it consistently will make you a superstar.

By the way, being honest with others isn’t a license to be a jerk. Kindness always trumps candor. In fact, candor is kindness. You don’t have to be loud or obnoxious, or the least bit insulting, to give feedback that is honest and hopeful.

The reason you’re doing this in the first place is to help them. So, help them.

To get started you might need to premise your insight with a quick question or two: “Would you like my feedback?” or “Can I be honest with you?”

Once you have permission, you now have a duty to be honest. And remember, you want that same candor from others — especially when you are desperate to level up. Extend the same honesty to others.

2. Ask Questions

You see the world through your own perspective — which is great until you expect that others share that same outlook. Which they likely won’t.

You see what you see based on years of your own life experience and struggle. And that’s different for all of us.

The only way to get the perspective of others is to ask them for it. Asking questions. Probing. Digging into the reason behind the explanation.

Asking questions will help you increase the growth of your business. It’s a skill that will help you build better relationships and avoid unnecessary conflict — and solve just about any other sticky situation where other people are involved.

The simplest question is “why”. It’s somewhat crude and often misunderstood to be offensive if delivered with the wrong tone, but it is at the core of all questions.

Why does it matter? Why are you doing that? Why do you think what you think?

But beyond “why”, there are many other important questions that will get you the answers you need.

Questions to help you level up in business and in your relationships — but also to help you dig a bit deeper into your own psyche. To help you get clear on the baggage in your mind that can often be debilitating.

Here are a few of those questions you’ll want to practice asking yourself:

  1. Would I be embarrassed if other people were to know that I was making this decision?
  2. What advice would I give someone else if they were in my position?
  3. Is this a legitimate step towards getting closer to where I want to be or am I chasing a shortcut?
  4. When I look back at this decision, how will I feel?
  5. What else haven’t I considered that might help me make a better decision?
  6. Am I making this decision based on fear?
  7. Can I deal with the consequences that will come from making this decision, this way?

Ask yourself the hard questions. Be clear about your intentions, even if it isn’t something you want to share with anyone else.

And then practice the art of asking questions.

MOST CONVERSATIONS WOULD BE MORE PRODUCTIVE IF THE FIRST WORDS SAID CAME IN THE FORM OF A QUESTION.

Try it. You’ll find it uncomfortable at first. But like any important skill, if you deliberately stick with it, you will find yourself spending less time on hurt feelings and misunderstood intentions.

3. Do Things That Matter

It seems obvious that high performers do things that matter.

However, it’s not that simple. High performers don’t start doing things that matter after they are high performers, it’s what makes them high performers in the first place.

Doing what matters is the playbook. The road map.

The answer is actually quite simple. You only have so much time in a day.

You’re going to spend half the day working — or working to get to work. You’ll spend another 8 hours sleeping — or getting ready for or out of bed.

After you factor in eating, reading, working out, and personal entertainment, you probably only have a few hours (if any at all) that are all yours.

WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR TIME ULTIMATELY DETERMINES YOUR DESTINY.

Doing things that matter is your shortcut to consistent and reliable progress.

The faster you focus on what matters, the more quickly you’ll move around obstacles and the less frustrated you’ll feel by failure.

But it’s not always easy to see what matters.

Priorities change. So does your environment. And the world around you is constantly changing. All of that comes straight at you — at a torrid pace that is confusing and overwhelming.

The only way out is to stop and live in quietness. Even if only temporarily.

That quietness is your compass, pointing you towards greatness. In the direction of what really matters.

But sometimes, even that doesn’t work. You can’t find quietness because of the chaos and noise inside your head.

And so you have to fall back on timeless activities that are proven to propel you towards progress, regardless of your goals or the obstacles in your way.

Here are a few of them:

  1. Make time to improve your “mind game”. — Everything you ever do — or don’t do — is a direct result of how you think — and what you allow yourself to keep thinking about. Be aware of which thoughts make you act which way. By the way, meditation is a great exercise to figure this all out. Try using Calm or Headspace or Omvana if you want to master this skill.

  2. Take time to get physical. — Instead of eliminating regular exercise from your schedule, protect the time you work up a sweat. Run. Punch. Kick. Cycle. Just move fast. You’ll find yourself thinking of ideas you wouldn’t have considered. You’ll return to your work focused. And — you’ll eliminate a bunch of the frustration and pettiness you would otherwise direct at those around you.

  3. Stop wasting time on regrets or worries. — It’s easy to spin out of control when you think about what you could have done or should have done. Replace those negative thoughts with specific thoughts for moving towards where you want to be. Again, this about you being aware of what you are thinking. When you recognize negative thoughts you pause and switch them to thoughts that help you get closer to where you want to be.

  4. Reduce the time you spend on entertainment. — It’s amazing how distracting a binge-watch session on Netflix can be. Instead of working toward success, your brain goes to mush when you call up the latest episode instead of working on the things that matter most. Sometimes, you need to take a break and reboot. But that shouldn’t be a “most of the time” thing.

  5. Get more sleep. — Most human beings need 6 to 8 hours of sleep each night to operate at optimum performance. Your brain reboots. Your immune system recharges. Your body gets a bit more resilient. The more sleep you can get, the more likely you are to stay strong and healthy — and clear-minded. When you do more, you need more sleep. Don’t overdo the sleeping part and don’t think you can cheat time by sleeping less. It’s guaranteed to backfire on you.

  6. Pay attention to the details. — Getting things done isn’t the same as getting things done well. Don’t just check things off your list. Make sure you’ve done the best that you can do. Take the time to reflect on what you can do better the next time. Dig deep into the success you want for yourself. Hone in on what other people who have achieved the success you want for yourself are doing. Always be learning and growing.

  7. Avoid everyone and anything who takes you off your game. — It doesn’t really matter why or when or who — negativity and fear and worry and confusion will crush your ability to get to where you want to be. So avoid it. Don’t try to contain it. Or tolerate it. Get as far away from it, as you can. It might not be forever, but for now, you need to anything that is negative completely behind you.

More importantly, this is a mindset. A deliberate way of spending your time.

Make no mistake, three simple rules won’t fix everything. They aren’t the perfect formula for every obstacle standing in your way.

But they do give you a foundation to stand on. A platform to launch from.

And when life is hard and your dreams are big, sometimes it’s important to know that you have a few simple rules guiding your pathway to success.

11 Ways to Update Your Sales Strategy for 2020 (& Get Your Best Results Ever)

11 Ways to Update Your Sales Strategy for 2020 (& Get Your Best Results Ever)

by EDGY InsightsRevenue

Sales needs an overhaul.

It’s no secret that buying and selling is the same now as 5,000 years ago. We’re addicted to hollow phrases and people-less selling. We will talk to anybody — whether they’re interested or not. A sale is a sale is a sale.

To get better results, you need to rethink your system. Here are 11 unconventional ways to bring your selling strategy into the 21st century.

1) Prospect part-time

Sure, you should let your friends know what you do. Some may care. Some may even be interested, but there is a time and a place for everything. It’s a misconception that you always need to be prospecting. Your friends would much rather hear about your venture while sitting at a coffee shop than at their wedding reception. It’s great that you are excited about the value you are offering, but don’t shove it down people’s throats. Quality over quantity is a good rule of thumb when scouting for prospective buyers.

2) Speak like a 10th-grader

Every industry has their own set of coy, unintelligible acronyms that are bantered around with linguistic deft — as if the words themselves give us authority.

This doesn’t work. New customers are intimidated because they don’t know what the heck we are talking about, and we seem like every other salesperson out there force feeding them confusion.

Most U.S. newspapers have a 9th to 11th- grade reading level. That’s so everyone can understand. So ditch the jargon, and use terms your buyers are already familiar with. They shouldn’t need their dictionary to keep up.

3) Throw away your business cards

OK, maybe don’t throw them all away, but definitely use them as a secondary source of connection. It’s very rare that people even pick up the phone and make a call these days. Everything is email and messaging. Facebook and LinkedIn. In the days of the Rolodex, the business card was your own personal Yellow Pages. In an era where an executive worked thirty years for the same company, keeping phone numbers on pieces of paper made sense. That’s out of place in today’s social landscape.

Ten years from now, people won’t even know the word “business card.” It will be as obsolete as recording your favorite song on a cassette tape.

4) Stop talking about yourself

In our emails, voicemails, and sales presentations, all we talk about is “us”: Our product, our process, our unique differentiation. It’s how we start our correspondence and end our sales pitch.

We’ve forgotten the power of the buyer’s pain and passion. And that’s just sad, because that’s the one thing that really matters. Without buyers, there are no salespeople. To be successful, adopt a caring, nurturing, and friendly attitude. Build your business around this helpfulness.

5) Write shorter emails

Emails are a great way to touch base with current and prospective clients. The problem? We all want to say too much too soon. If Twitter has taught us nothing else, we know people have incredibly short attention spans.

So shorten your emails to four to five sentences. Those don’t have to be short sentences, but you definitely want them to be interesting, digestible pieces of information. Keeping your emails mobile-friendly and focused is key to getting the action you want from buyers.

6) Go off-script

In our quest to be more productive, we built sales processes. And with the best of intentions, we created a well-thought series of qualification questions and buyer agreements. We started to demand “upfront commitments” from interested prospects in order to share more of our insights.

Unfortunately, these strategies have made us less effective, less impressive performers. It’s hard to care when you’re following a script. With that in mind, don’t be afraid to adapt your strategy to the prospect.

7) Cancel your networking event

As towns sprang up across the prairie, merchants caravanned a wide assortment of goods from the East to their local area. The shop owner would network with the local buyers. Shaking hands and buying prospects drinks became ways to build rapport and trust. That hasn’t evolved much in the last few hundred years. We find ourselves still slapping backs, buying beers, and feigning intimacy. And that’s OK. You can still do that.

You don’t really need to cancel your networking event, but you will get more out of your event if you create unconventional ideas and give away valuable industry knowledge. It will make your event way more attractive than the other company’s.

8) Make friendly phone calls

Calling new prospects with new ideas is nothing to be ashamed of. We use terms like “warm calling” and create passionate line-in-the-sand sales training about what is right and what is wrong. There is nothing wrong with selling your dream product. Being a jerk or bully to get it sold is something else.

Make the phone call. Be upfront about why you’re calling. Be honest about what you want. Listen to the objections. Answer the questions. And don’t get hurt feelings when someone tells you “no.” Thank them and move on to the next potential sale.

9) Check your check-in

Somehow we missed the memo that our clients really don’t care about our personal schedules. The idea that we place a call or send an email to a customer with the opening line “I just wanted to check in with you” is silly. More than that, it indicates a sloppy sales process. Somewhere upstream in the process, the opportunity wasn’t qualified properly, or you didn’t get key information. The “check-in” reveals you need to review your sales process and build new skills. Try starting every conversation with the word “you” and don’t reach out unless you are delivering additional value.

10) Apologize

Somehow being fallible seems to vanish when we emerge each morning from our “bat cave” and head out to sell. When we refuse to apologize, we hurt our reputation, put off the customer, and miss a chance to connect. Emotion is like a pendulum.

Crying can turn into laughter with the right comment. Anger and frustration can turn into relief and appreciation with the right touch. And instead of using this to our advantage (and frankly, just doing the right thing) we stand with our chests pushed out, defiantly reminding our customer that “we don’t make mistakes like that.” Admit when you screwed up, and make amends so the buyer knows you’re truly sorry.

11) Send a “Box of Awesome”

Before people are ready to work with you, they have to know you are serious about doing business with them. The “Box of Awesome” does just that. It’s a gift — something that shows you’re invested in the partnership and are willing to go the extra mile. The contents don’t need to be too fancy or expensive, but they shouldn’t be some Post-Its and a glow-in-the-dark slinky that’ll break in two seconds. 

Breaking away from selling norms will help you stand out from the other salespeople badgering your prospects, and more importantly, form genuine relationships.

It's on you to get what you want from life - blog by Dan Waldschmidt

It’s On You To Get What You Want From Life

by AttitudeEDGY Insights

You are responsible for your actions. Completely responsible.

There is never a time when you are not responsible for what you do, what you think, and the results that you achieve.

It doesn’t matter what other people are doing to you. It doesn’t matter what other people are getting away with. Your life, your priorities, and your perspective are all completely your responsibility.

It is easy to be distracted by what is going on around you. It’s natural to think that because someone else is getting away with something wrong that consequences don’t apply to everyone. They do.

The truth is that no one gets away with anything.

What you do earns you the results that you get. It may take you years or decades to experience the consequences of your actions. But there’s never a time when you earn a different result than the actions you execute.

It’s really that simple. What you do matters. What you do leads to clear and distinct results.

You’re not responsible for the timing of those results. Usually, you can’t change when you get what’s coming to you. You are, however, completely responsible for you.

Think about the frustrations you face in your life right now.

You think you need more resources or you need more time. If it’s not one of those, it’s something else you think you need. You’re frustrated because you feel like you could be more successful if life gave you your chance. More resources. Less of the bad stuff.

That’s a dangerous way to think.

The truth is that it’s on you to get what you want from life.

If you want something that you don’t have, go and get it. Don’t wait for other people to realize your situation and ask to help you. Fight for yourself.

It might require personal sacrifice. It might mean that you have less free time — or less money to spend on fun. But that’s the cost of getting what you want. That’s the price of taking back ownership of your life. And destiny.

And just in case you think that life has it in for you, let’s be clear about something else.

Bad stuff happens to all of us — not just people we might label as “losers”.

It’s true that successful people get to write history. But if you look at the traits that those people share, you will see something remarkable

  1. They remain eternally optimistic
  2. They are “all in” on their own success
  3. They make fewer excuses and expect less fairness
  4. They know exactly what they want to achieve next
  5. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make progress
  6. They don’t care what anyone else thinks about them

Look around at the people you think of as successful. They share these same qualities, don’t they?

Now, before you get angry and disagree –or find fault with my choice of words, let’s dig into this a bit deeper.

You’re responsible for getting to where you want to be.

You alone. It doesn’t matter where you come from, what you been through, or where you are right now.

The life you’re living is of your doing. It’s the result of everything you’ve done or not done to get to this point right now.

Make no mistake, you’re going to need help from others to achieve breakthrough. That’s normal. And natural. We all need somebody. And in most cases, a lot of somebodies. But let’s be super clear about this. It’s you. All you.

Think about the last time you ran a race.

Whether it’s a 5K, half marathon, or something longer you’ll find people at the starting line, at the finish line, and throughout the race holding signs that encourage you to keep running.

Some of them will even have cowbells or plastic trumpets that they’re blowing. Cheering for you. Telling you to keep going. That you’re almost there. But it’s on you to move your legs.

No amount of cheering or support can force you to keep running when you have decided that you’re going to quit.

So what does this tell us about making forward progress?

What can we learn about getting all we want from life?

Most people are not as successful as they could be because they aren’t willing to go far enough.

Many people work hard. Few people work hard enough.

Many people are determined. Few people are truly willing to do what it takes.

Many people hope for success. Few people believe it will happen.

These are “almost-indistinguishably-different” positions too. The people who work hard but not hard enough look “scary similar” to the people who are willing to put in enough effort to achieve results. 

They usually use the same nouns and verbs. They often look they are doing the exact same thing. But with enough time, history makes the difference clear.

And this isn’t about money.

Getting what you want from life isn’t all about making more money. That’s a really small part of success.

In fact, there are many more stories of people achieving mindblowing feats of greatness outside of wealth — in math, sports, science, and politics. Where driven people with clear goals decide to be magnificently accountable for their own actions and outcomes.

We all start from different places in life. Most of us are in the middle of the crazy extremes we use as illustrations of success or failure. No one is probably going to be making a movie about the story of your life.

And that’s absolutely ok.

Regardless of each your starting point, forward progress is simply a matter of will. You have to truly believe that — or you won’t achieve your true potential. Whatever that is.

So own your day. Own your destiny. Own this moment. Take about control of your life.

Refuse to blame anyone else for where you’ve been and the frustrations you have faced along the way your journey.

Listen to the crowd cheering — and sometimes jeering — and just keep moving forward. One step at a time.

You’re already strong enough. Smart enough. Tough enough. You just need to believe that you’re responsible for you.

Be the boss of you.

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The Opposite Of Success Isn't Losing. It's Not Caring In The First Place.

The Opposite Of Success Isn’t Losing. It’s Not Caring In The First Place.

by EDGY Insights
The opposite of success isn’t losing. It’s not failure. Or loss. The opposite of success is apathy. Not caring. But it hurts to care. It’s painful to want to be successful and end up in a different place. It’s hard to believe that you’re meant for a bigger purpose, but not be able to achieve the results you envision.
Just know that losing isn’t the worst position to be in. The worst position in which to find yourself is when you have stopped caring.
When you stop trying. When you give in to passive aggression and making excuses. When you stop daring to lay it all on the line in the hopes that it won’t hurt so bad if you end up not being successful. Something happens to us as adults where we begin to mask apathy as wisdom. It’s a devilish thing — trying to pretend that caring is a sign of immaturity and weakness.

AND IN A CERTAIN SENSE, IT’S NOT WRONG.

When you’re young and naive, you care about everything. It matters when you turn the lights out at night, the color of the icing on your birthday cake, and what your friends at school think about you. You don’t have to be a parent for long to find yourself in these sort of amusingly absurd conversations — with a child in tears weeping genuinely about a part of their life that seems to make no sense. Yet for them it is important. It is critical. It’s something they care about. In that moment, deeply. It was Helen Keller who said that “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart.” Maybe she would have changed her mind had she been able to see.

BUT HER PERSPECTIVE STILL RINGS POWERFULLY TRUE.

Before you see success, you feel it. Before you hear about great outcomes, you already feel them. Even if you’re not an especially intuitive person, you can tell by someone’s expression or how their eyes look away from you quickly how they feel about you. You feel it. You can’t explain it, but you know it to be true. Think about how miserable and misguided your life would be if you weren’t able to feel these things. So why turn that off when it comes to your pursuit of success? Why stop yourself from feeling the misery of setbacks and not getting to where you want to be? Peter Bregman and his powerful book on leadership, Leading With Emotional Courage: How to Have Hard Conversations, Create Accountability, And Inspire Action On Your Most Important Work, wrote that “leaders need to feel, even when they don’t enjoy the feelings they feel.”

THE SAME AS TRUE FOR YOU.

You can’t truly appreciate triumph until you’re vulnerable enough to experience the discomfort and sadness that comes with losing along the way. Feel it. Feel it all. You don’t have to enjoy it. But it’s better than feeling nothing.
It is those feelings of loss and discomfort that enable you to make the hard decisions that ultimately lead to successful outcomes. Remember that.
When you’re feeling like nothing is ever going to be good again, ask yourself what’s wrong. And then be honest enough to make the hard changes that progress demands. Regardless of how you feel.

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If You Can Tough It Out You Will Figure It Out

If You Can Tough It Out You Will Figure It Out

by EDGY Insights

You’re tougher than you think you are. You can work longer than you think you can work.

You can keep trying a few more times before you’re all out of ideas.

You can think harder than you’re thinking right now.

You can figure out a way to fix your financial problems no matter how troubling they are.

You can lose weight this time even though you have struggled to do it all those other times in the past.

You can learn more about what you’re already an expert in. Don’t let the battle beat you down.

Stop talking yourself out of doing what needs to be done before you even get to the point where you’re out of options.

THAT IS JUST FEAR AND PANIC TAKING OVER. AND IT USUALLY ISN’T FOR YOUR BENEFIT.

Talking yourself out of a stressful situation before you even get started is a recipe for never getting started at all.

When challenges arise and problems seem insurmountable, your challenge is not to have all the solutions all the time, it’s just to remind yourself that no matter the obstacle in your way, you are tough enough to figure it out.

You’re strong enough to keep trying. You’re tenacious and determined enough to do whatever it takes.

That won’t change the size or scariness the obstacle in your way, but it will remind you about the most important part of being successful.

IF YOU CAN TOUGH IT OUT YOU’LL FIGURE IT OUT.

I know first-hand the power of that.

I’m not a gifted intellectual – or a business savant. But by putting in the work, I have figured out what works.

It is a process that keeps on giving value — to everyone with which I engage.

Here are a few of those lessons that I have learned. Maybe they will help you figure it out, while you’re toughing it out.

  1. The people in your life always end up mattering more than the amount of money you have in your bank account. But more effort into the people you claim to love the most.
  2. The critics in your life aren’t there to give you a logical and helpful path towards success. They want to destroy you — or at least hold you back until your dream is destroyed. 
  3. There is a difference between having an idea and doing whatever it takes to turn that idea into success. Be an effort person — not an idea person. If you can be both, do it.
  4. You won’t be able to listen to other people’s negative opinions about you for long and still remain motivated. Avoid negativity like the plague that it is. Anything that brings you down is the enemy of awesome.
  5. Usually, the biggest difference between success and failure is that small detail you didn’t think really mattered. Pay attention to the tiny details that you can use as leverage to level up
  6. You won’t even know how to begin to work smart until you’ve exhausted all your options for working hard. Stop trying to make the perfect decision and just take the first step.
  7. Time has a perfect track record of righting all wrongs and rewarding those who deserve it most. Don’t let yourself get stressed out by a lack of fairness. They will get what is coming to them. So will you.
  8. You can spend your time fighting for other people to think you’re awesome or you can just do the work to be awesome. The short term solution feels good for a short while. The long term play is legendary.
  9. Being passive aggressive is a guaranteed shortcut to living a life that is as unsuccessful as it is uninspired. If you feel something, say something. Be candid. Be kind. You can do both at the same time.
  10. The best way to make massive amounts of money is to deliver massive amounts of value to those who need it most. Think first about what other people get out of their interactions with you.
  11. There isn’t much in your life that isn’t completely within your control to change right now if you want to. You are, in truth, the master of your destiny — for good or bad or crazy. Blaming others is a waste of time.

Life comes at you fast. Failure seems scary. The path forward can be cloudy and gray. 

Just remember that with enough time you will figure it out. So tough it out until then.

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The Secret To Getting Busy Executives To Take Your Phone Call

by EDGY Insights

You’ve been there before. The phone rings — breaking you out of your concentration. You’ve been focused on a complex task. Trying to solve a problem that has stumped you for hours.

As the phone rings a second time, your hand moves from your mouse to the edge of the phone, ready to pick up the handset. Your eyes glance at the name showing on the screen.

You pause for a second.

As the phone rings a third time, you realize that you have just a second to make a decision. Do you take the call or do you get back to solving the hard problem that you have been working on all morning?

That’s reality.

You just happen to be on the other side of the call. You’re the one doing the interrupting. Jolting executives out of their concentration as they try to solve serious problems that have them confused and frustrated.

Your call only adds to that confusion.

But it also adds some clarity.

Your client only has a few seconds to make a gut-level decision about your value to them. That’s it. There’s no time for complex arguments or for them to scan your latest white paper.

In a few seconds, every thing that you have ever done for them pops to the forefront of their decision-making ability.

It’s raw and gritty. It might make you uncomfortable. But it’s the most honest of business relationships. There is a decision — do they take your call or do they shrug you off?

They know the truth.

Do you provide value to them or do they know that you’re calling to “just check in on them” — probably peddling another technology solution that’s close to the one they already bought from you last year. Sure you might be calling to ask them to hang out with you for a beer or to grab a quick lunch, but they know that that’s all part of your plan to extract more money out of them. To close more deals.

And in a second or two it’s all becomes clear. You can’t fake it. You have to live it. The ringing phone demands a solution. Which brings us to the point of this discussion.

Your can’t provide value when you need to get results.

By then, it is too late.

The opportunity to create lasting memories is over. You have to start caring right now — even when it seems like you don’t really need to care.

The truth is, you’ve never needed to care any more than you do right now. Right now is all you have. There is no tomorrow unless you start caring today.

  • There are no phone calls.
  • There are no email exchanges.
  • There is no extra revenue.

It doesn’t work.

Nothing works until you start loving people.

Until you love the people that you want to do business with.

If there’s one thing that we’ve all learned in the last half decade of economic decline around the world, it is that people are frail and hurting beings. We’ve learned that we’re a little more fallible than we thought we were before. We’ve realized that destruction and utter chaos is a possibility. Sometimes an inevitability.

Which is why the conversation needs to change from value and solutions and service to something much more powerful. To something much more potent.

Discussions with your clients needs to be about the gritty, personal side of life. You don’t need to be corny but you do need to be caring. This isn’t about passive aggression or manipulation; it’s about a heart-felt interpretation of life and the people doing business in that life.

To grow you have to love people.

Economic patterns come and go. Businesses will fall and they grow.

Most of that will never be in your control, ever — no more than you can cause the sun to shine or the rain to fall.

You are helpless when it comes to cosmic change. But you can change your own attitude about those you do business with. You can give a hand up instead of looking for a handout. You can be genuine instead of going for the jugular. You can love and care and cry instead of twisting and cajoling and pressuring.

The decision is yours.

As the phone rings, your business intentions stand naked before the judgments of your customer. No excuses. No explanations. Only the value you’ve created stands to persuade your client to pick up the phone and hear you out.

When you give as a strategy. When you give with intention. When you give more than people deserve to get, you create a relationship that drives your client to engage with you. They’re still busy, still frustrated, but willing to hear you out. Willing to give you a chance.

Because you’ve given them much more already.

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Why Doing The Right Thing Is Always The Right Thing

by EDGY Insights

It is not always easy to do the right thing. At times it can be hard to know what the right thing even is. Bad personal experiences and stressful work environments make long-term thinking and personal morals a challenge to execute consistently. Or even at all.

LIFE COMES AT YOU FAST.

So fast that it’s natural to react to life experiences by making the choice that is least painful at the moment. By choosing to relieve temporary uncomfortableness with a decision to get you out of trouble for the moment.

But most of the time, the fast decision is the wrong decision. The easy decision is the wrong decision. The decision that fixes “right now” is the wrong decision.

The fact that you feel forced into the decision makes the odds of you making the right decision even harder.

You’re not thinking straight.

YOUR VIEW OF THE WORLD IS SCREWED UP.

It’s biased in a big way.  Your mind and body is screaming at you to do whatever it takes to relieve the pressure and pain that is squeezing down on you at the moment.

So it’s important to remember how important making the right decision really is.

The truth is that what your life becomes is a direct result of all the stressed-out, painful short-term decisions you make each and every day. Each decision contributes to the results that you will realize one day. You are creating your future.

If you make the wrong decisions consistently — even small ones — you will end up with results that are embarrassing and expose you to be the fraud that you really were all along.

If you consistently take the “easy way” and pursue shortcuts in the hope of “getting rich quick”, then you’ll find yourself in a future where you continue to be poor — mentally and financially.

If you blame others for your mistakes and refuse to take correction or learn from bad decisions that you have made in the past, then the results of your life will only be misery and arrogance.

YOU WILL BECOME THE PERSON YOU DECIDE TO BE.

Which is why doing the right thing is always the right thing to do. Because doing the wrong thing molds you into the type of person that you don’t want to be.  And it doesn’t lead to the results and lifestyle that you want for yourself.

For a few short moments, making the wrong decision feels incredibly right. But that’s a guilty pleasure you will come to regret in the not-too-distant future.

Do the right thing.

It’s tough at time.  But a lot easier than living in a world of misery  and pain you’ve created with poor choices and short-sighted decisions.

It’s easier to just do the right thing.

This Edgy Insight was first published on danwaldschmidt.com

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11 Lessons For Winning I Learned Running 100 Miles In The Ozark Mountains

by EDGY Insights

It was 4:15 am when my alarm went off. I slowly pulled myself out of the hotel bed and shuffled over to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Today was the day. After years of running and several intense months of targeted training, I was as prepared as possible for this race.

OR SO I THOUGHT.

Two pairs of compression shorts, wool low-cut socks, my Brooks Launch running shoes with 1,200 miles already on them, and a bag full of gear.

Sara and I popped down three flights of stairs, jumped into her Ford Explorer, and drove the 30 miles to Camp Ouachita.

We thought we might get there a little earlier than we actually did. We were almost late. We quickly grabbed my running bib, checked in with the race officials, and went to find anybody we recognized in the darkness of the predawn.

A FEW MINUTES LATER THE GUN WENT OFF.

I found myself jogging down an asphalt road to the beginning of the trail head. I would stay on this trail in the middle of the Ozark Mountains for the next 100 miles.

As it began to run, I thought about what had brought me to this moment. I began to think about the lessons I had learned along the way.

Here are a few of those:

  1. Sometimes you gotta be pushed into doing the right thing. — I was at my favorite running store, Run In! in downtown Greenville, SC, when my buddies, John and Dane, told me about this race and prodded me into doing it. “You’ll totally crush this,” they told me. “Plus we’re doing it too…” That bit of encouragement was enough to inspire me to push my limits.  Who are you inspiring?
  2. If you’re serious about winning, you seriously need to get help. — I’ve run close to 6,000 miles in the last few years.  I know how to put one foot in front of the other. When I hired Zach Bitter, the fastest ultra-runner in the world, to coach me, my skills reached a completely new level — faster, stronger, more confident. It took me getting help to get better. What help do you need?
  3. You can’t do it all on your own. You need a strong team. — Sara stayed up almost 30 hours to make sure I had everything I needed during the race. Almost 300 race volunteers served us sandwiches, soup, and a non-stop stream of water bottles. My mom and dad watched our kids while we were away. It was the team around me that enabled me to do my best. What team do you need to make you better?
  4. To win you have to focus on what you’re doing right now and nothing else. — A lot of the race was a blur. The landscape around me was beautiful, but I was looking at the trail and my shoes. I wasn’t responding to emails, taking pictures, tweeting, or even wearing a shirt (for a lot of the time). I was just thinking about getting to the next aid station. What do you need to be focusing on?
  5. Big goals start with small steps and continue with steady progress. — You run 100 miles by striking the ground 176,500 times with one of your feet. One stride and then another and then another until you cover all 528,000 feet of the race. You have to get started with something small and then keep going until you achieving something epic. What small step do you need to take right now?
  6. You can’t stop fueling your desire to win. — I ate a dozen peanut butter and jelly sandwiches while the weather was warm.  I switched to hot noodle soup when it got cold out. Even though I didn’t feel like eating I knew that if I didn’t force myself to keep eating that my body would shut down before the finish line. The same is true with inspiration.  What motivation do you need to searching for?
  7. You have to tune out the pain if you want the reward. — It’s going to hurt at some point. You’re going to feel like you can’t take another step. You’re going to have to grit your teeth and choose to win. Not because you love pain — but because you want the reward bad enough. That’s what you are thinking about — winning. And so you keep pushing. What reward do you need to be thinking about?
  8. No one can make you stop but you can talk yourself out of it pretty quickly. — Self-doubt and negative mind chatter is the fastest way to give up before you reach the finish line. If you think “you can’t”, you won’t do what it takes. You’ll quit.  And that quitting will impact the rest of your life . You’ll regret for the rest of your life that you didn’t try harder. What new attitude do you need?
  9. Great friends challenge you to be your best. — Almost 70 miles into my run I waited for the runner behind me to catch up. I was tired of running by myself and wanted some conversation. That turned into more than 5 hours of friendship. When you see the guy beside you running through the pain it gives you the courage to do it yourself. What new friends do you need in your life?
  10. Just because you win doesn’t mean you won’t get hurt. — I was shaking so badly after I crossed the finish line that Sara wasn’t sure how to get me back to the car. My legs wouldn’t work. The next morning I had to walk backwards to get down the stairs. For the next 24 hours after that I had trouble walking at all. Even simple human tasks were a blast of pain. It took about 3 days to finally recover. What do you need to recover from?
  11. Just because you win doesn’t mean you can stop wanting to win. — This race is over — 100 miles in the books. I finished 4th place overall. But there is always another race — another challenge. Another reason to want to win. That desire and commitment to win is a flame that you have to keep burning. It is what is keeping you alive. What do you need to do to fuel your desire to win?

The sun came out and went back down while I was still running. It went from cold to warm to hot and back cold again — and I was still on that same trail in the middle of the Ozark Mountains.

It was 1:18AM the next morning when I reached the final safety station.

“Number 126 coming to the finish line”, was what I heard the operator say into his walkie talkie. He looked at me and Nick and gestured toward the trail: “You have 2.6 miles to go, and you’re there.”

And so I began to run a little bit faster. Trying to beat the clock. Part of a mile by part of a mile.

SOON, IN THE NEAR DISTANCE, I COULD HEAR MUSIC.

They knew we were coming. Sara was there. The race director was there. The finish line was there.

At 1:29 AM, just 19 hours 29 minutes 21 seconds after I started, I finished running 100 miles.

I’m still not finished learning these lessons.

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You Have To Do The Hard Things

by EDGY Insights

You have to make the call you’re afraid to make.

You have to get up earlier than you want to get up.

You have to give more than you get in return right away.

You have to care more about others than they care about you.

You have to fight when you are already injured, bloody, and sore.

You have to feel unsure and insecure when playing it safe seems smarter.

You have to lead when no one else is following you yet.

You have to invest in yourself even though no one else is.

You have to look like a fool while you’re looking for answers you don’t have.

You have to grind out the details when it’s easier to shrug them off.

You have to deliver results when making excuses is an option.

You have to search for your own explanations even when you’re told to accept the “facts”.

You have to make mistakes and look like an idiot.

You have to try and fail and try again.

You have to run faster even though you’re out of breath.

You have to be kind to people who have been cruel to you.

You have to meet deadlines that are unreasonable and deliver results that are unparalleled.

You have to be accountable for your actions even when things go wrong.

You have to keep moving towards where you want to be no matter what’s in front of you.

You have to do the hard things

The things that no one else is doing. The things that scare you. The things that make you wonder how much longer you can hold on.

Those are the things that define you. Those are the things that make the difference between living a life of mediocrity or outrageous success.

The hard things are the easiest things to avoid. To excuse away. To pretend like they don’t apply to you.

The simple truth about how ordinary people accomplish outrageous feats of success is that they do the hard things that smarter, wealthier, more qualified people don’t have the courage — or desperation — to do.

Do the hard things. You might be surprised at how amazing you really are.

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